[ m o m e n t s ]
by kHo

He leaned against the counter letting his mind wander and chewing idly on a carrot stick. Melodic guitar music filled the air and Sands found himself thinking that when it wasn´t annoying as fuck it could be pretty soothing. He almost smiled but the strumming stopped and it quickly became a frown.

“That is all you´re eating,’ El asked, his voice soft and somewhere between disapproving and amused.

“At the moment, yes. Or did you think somehow I´ve managed to hide a burger inside the carrot?’

He heard a slight puff of air and was hard pressed to decide if it was a sigh or a laugh. “You are too skinny.’

“Thanks Mom,’ he said, breaking his carrot in half and nibbling on the end of one of them. “But ya know, gotta eat your carrots. Improves your eye sight.’

It wasn´t quite as fulfilling for Sands to be the only one laughing at that, but El was always less inclined to find the same things funny as him. “Why do you do that?’

“Do what,’ Sands asked, mentally rolling eyes that haven´t been there for going on six months.

“Joke.’

“Because it amuses me, El,’ he answered, bored with having to repeat himself for the millionth time. “That´s kind of, ya know, the point of a joke.’

“It´s not funny.’

“It´s funny to me,’ Sands said, his smile finally fading fully as he reached out and dragged the chair away from the table. Turning it around he straddled it backwards, dangling his arms over the back of the chair. “And that´s all that matters.’

“But that is all you do, Sands. Joke. It´s not healthy.’

Sands laughed again, a humorless hollow laugh. “Who the fuck are you to tell me what´s healthy and what´s not? Seems to me I´m the only judge on what´s funny to me.’

The strumming started again and Sands thought for a moment he recognized Dust in the Wind. The tune changed just before he could be positive though, and that was good because the last thing he wanted to hear was Kansas right now. He was a long way from home, Toto, and thanks for reminding him.

He lowered his chin and propped it on top of his curled fists, chewing the bits of carrot in his mouth slowly, letting his mind wander again. Moments like these, the kinds of moments that would have driven him insane months ago, were all he looked forward to anymore. Moments of pure nothingness, of stillness. Of not quite quietness, but quiet enough. When he didn´t have to perk his ears up for the sounds of shuffling feet and muffled orders to signal him to duck as El rose with his Guitar of Retribution.

“Have you always been so skinny?’

Sands laughed, nodding. “Yes.’

The strings still thrummed with the beat of his heart as El thought too much about how to state his words. “Then perhaps you shouldn´t eat only carrots.’

“Maybe I‘m making commentary,’ he said, his grin turning just this side of wicked. “On the fact that the only time you and I get along is when we´re fucking like bunnies.’

“I knew there was a phallic joke just waiting to come out of that,’ El said, and if Sands wasn´t mistaken there was a smile behind those words.